The Bug Trauma

So, I think I’ve mentioned a few times that I’m not a big fan of bugs. Marin however, thinks bugs are fun. Recently she was playing in the yard and yelled at me to come look.


Marin- “Mommy! Come look what I found!”

Me- “What is it?”

Marin- “It’s a bug! Come look!”

Me, not nearly as thrilled- “Ok, I’m coming.”

Marin- “Look! Look!”

Me, shocked and disgusted- “Oh my God! You have a cicada!”

Marin- “I know. It’s a great bug!”

I tried to be cool about the whole thing since she actually likes bugs but cicadas are scary. I immediately flashed back to the time years ago that my cat caught one and was trying to bring it to me. It was screaming in his mouth and clearly the cat thought he was contributing to the family with the bug present. I had no choice to run as the cat chased me with a bug.

Katie was playing on the trampoline yesterday. It was pretty uneventful until she came back inside all upset.

Me- “Katie, what’s wrong? Are you hurt?”

Katie, shaking her head and clearly still shaken- “I was lying down on the trampoline and I thought there was a leaf under my hand. I started crunching in up but it felt funny and it wasn’t a leaf! It was a cicada! Yuck!”

Then I laughed and she rubbed her cicada hand on me. She spent the rest of the evening touching people and saying cicada hands. Marin spent the rest of the evening screaming and running.

Out of the blue, less than an hour after the bug incident, Claire let out a blood-curdling, horror-movie-style scream. She ran to me, still screaming.


Me- “My God, Claire! What happened?”

Claire- “I was picking up a shirt on the floor and I felt something on my hand and it was a CRICKET! It was climbing up right here!”

I swear, I really wanted not to laugh.

What Kind of Monster Does She Think I Am?

Today I had the baby in the bathroom with me while I took a bath. Unfortunately, she was not the only member of the audience. There was also a cricket waiting patiently to hop at me given half a chance. The baby is not a big fan of the insect world so she gave the cricket a wide berth.

Her sisters have pointed out crickets to her and they think it’s funny when she points and says “Ewww! Ewww!” Of course, I think it’s funny as well. She doesn’t act like she is merely repeating her sisters; she seems to be truly offended by the presence of the crickets.

So if I know there is a cricket in the house, I will ask her where the bug is. Then she’ll point, say “Eww!” and generally avoid going anywhere near it. So then I might ask her if she wants to get the bug. Of course she’s horrified at the notion and she’ll say “No!”

After my bath, I was in the kitchen with the baby, fixing her bottle. She was standing a few feet away, bending over by something on the floor. I walked over to see what she had found and it was a cricket. It was on its back and not moving. I think that must have been the reason that the baby didn’t immediately recognize it. I grabbed the flyswatter and all of a sudden it came back to life. The baby stood way back as I escorted, via flyswatter, the cricket out the back door.

After feeding the baby lunch, I cut up a brownie and put it in a bowl for her. She’s generally a fan of anything sweet so I thought she would like it. I didn’t even give any thought to the fact that she had never had a brownie before. I set the bowl on a rug where she likes to sit and eat snacks.

Me- “Look Baby, it’s a brownie for you. It’s good.”
Baby, looks in bowl, chuckles and refuses to get near it again.
Me- “Come eat your brownie. It’s good.”
Baby- “No!” She was also eyeing the bowl with suspicion.

That’s when I realized what was going on. The baby thought I was giving her a bowl full of crickets.

My Mom, the Entomologist

I started my day off with a load of laundry. Normally that’s non-eventful but today I was barefoot and it’s cricket season. There is nothing that crickets like better than hiding in a pile of dirty laundry. You’d think that at some point I would remember that but no. The baby was standing on the back porch watching me as I threw stuff in the washer. Then, out of nowhere, a cricket hopped directly on top of my bare foot. I started screaming and shaking my foot. The baby thought it was a new game and she started shrieking and laughing.

A little later I walked into the kitchen and saw something on the floor. I looked closer and discovered that it was a big, nasty cricket leg.

I was talking to my mom and complaining about the crickets. I told her about the cricket on my foot and the lone leg. It was like a scene from an insect horror movie.

Me- “It was just the leg. How does that happen? I mean, where is the rest of the cricket?”

Mom- “I don’t know. Did you know that when crickets have sex they rub their back legs together? Maybe the sex got a little rough.”