Damn Baby

I was finally eating my lunch today around 3:30 in the afternoon. I was trying to hurry because the baby was fussing and wanted to be picked up. As most mothers know, babies seem to always want to be held when you are busy. Katie was getting irritated by the baby’s fussing and decided to complain.

“Mommy, the baby’s crying!”
“I know. I’m going to get her in a minute.”
Evidently that wasn’t acceptable to her.
She then yelled, “Mommy! Just get the damn baby!”

I briefly considered having a talk with her regarding her inappropriate language for a five year old but then decided to just pretend not to hear it. Sometimes you have to pick your battles. Just for the record, I have never used that phrase. This time I can honestly say that I have no idea where she got that.

So Much For Blaming Her Dad....

Me, spilling a pan of au gratin potatoes as I am removing it from the oven- “Oh, shit.”

I didn’t realize that my four year-old was right behind me.

Katie- “What happened?’

Me- “Oh, I just spilled some potatoes.”

Katie- “Oh, shit.”

I'm Blaming Her Father and I'm Sticking To My Story

I was changing the baby’s diaper and saw that it was filled with poop as soon as I opened it. Katie was standing right next to me and she saw too.

Katie- “Shit. Ewww.”

I was startled to hear my little four-year old use such language and thought that I must not have heard it right.

Me, still wondering if I really heard what I thought I heard- “What did you say?”

Katie- “Nothing.”

Me, trying to act like it was no big deal- “No, really Katie, what did you say?”

Katie- “I said she’s stinky.”


She’s a tricky one, that kid.