Wednesday, May 14, 2008

Lynne's Phone Call

Lynne, on the phone- “My tooth is hurting SO bad! I feel like I have labor pains in my mouth. Transition. Pray with me. Dear God, please help me with my mouth. I know you’re listening.”

Me- “Did you try Anbesol?”

Lynne- “No. Will that help?”

Me- “Maybe. Did it ever cross you’re mind that God just might want you to call a dentist?”

Lynne- “Ok, we’re going to the Dollar Store. I’ll try not to scream. Son-of-a-bitch! I have a frozen pizza in the oven. Oh Jesus, please forgive me for swearing. Oh, my God. I think it’s time to push.”

5 comments:

Anonymous said...

Is she starting one of her crazy spells?

Anonymous said...

Repeat after me: "By the power of the Holy Spirit, I command you evil spirits to LOOSE this woman's tooth! In Jesus' name!You must leave her body....Amen, Glory Hallelujah..."

Maybe this will bring her some relief...right up there with a hot pizza from the oven.

J. said...

Didn't she just dress up for the dentist not too long ago? Maybe he was too distracted to work on her teeth properly.

Jack said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
Jack said...

Since this is going all biblical . . to paraphrase Matthew: "if thine tooth offend thee, pluck it out, and cast it from thee:." ;o)

Note to self ... proofread before clicking.